Wednesday, December 17, 2008


There's more material on the way concerning our valiant Sarah, including commentary about the recent (and deplorable) case of arson at Wasilla Bible Church.

For months, people of vile purposes and evil hearts have declared Sarah to be their enemy--this is all the indication we require to realize how important and crucial Governor Palin continues to be as a virtuous, uncompromising American leader for our nation in perilous times now...and in the years to come.

Sarah's values and integrity are incongruous with this godless, self-absorbed age of rampant secularism. She jams the frequencies of the Marxist fools and egotists. Let's continue to support Palin with prayer and informed responses to those who seek her downfall.

You'll never bring this great woman down, liberals.

I'll return with a full scope of commentary after Christmas. Merry Christmas to all, indeed.

San Antonio, Texas

Tuesday, December 9, 2008


Sarah's interview appearance on Canada's CTV, wherein she talked about launching the natural gas pipeline, was excellent. Watching her work and speak so effectively for the benefit of our great nation (while Illinois liberals implode!) inspired my poetic side. Enjoy.

Sarah Palin's back at work and leading like a winner.

Meanwhile, in Chicago, there's another leftist sinner.

As Sarah's efforts move our nation forward in this slump,

One more of Barry's buddys drags it down into the dump.

Sarah's launched a pipeline in fulfillment of our dreams,

To harvest homeland assets that are bursting at the seams.

A triumph of free-enterprise--that's Sarah's contribution;

While Blago in Chicago adds to "ethical pollution."

The Gov up in Alaska blazes pathways to success...

The scum that runs Chicago shoves us deeper in distress!

And all the Marxist ninnies that elected B. Hussein

Can choke on their granola if the world goes down the drain.

"Our Savior didn't KNOW!" they'll cry. "Don't question The Messiah.

It's just like when he said he paid no heed to Jeremiah!"

These nitwits picked on Sarah, called her dumber than a duck

(While Barry's old pal Blago can't use any word save 'F&%#'?)

That Windy City dirtbag offers Senate seats for cash,

But what did we expect to see from such Chicago trash?

Blago, Rezko, Wright, and Ayers--what's missing in this drama?

Oh wait, there's been a name left-out...I'd wager it's "Obama."

--Daniel Archer, December 9, 2008

Monday, December 8, 2008


Surprise, surprise. Barbara Walters seems to think that Sarah Palin is stupid.

Yes, America held its bated, collective breath last week. Anxious citizens waited on seat-edges, atop pins & needles, and with fingertips gnawed to bloody stubs for the Great Walters to grace mere plebeians with her list of 2008's "10 Most Fascinating People."

Though her show would be more fascinating if it were annually called "10 Most Fascinating Reasons Why I'm Even Able To Utter A Sentence, What With This Cleft Palate and All The Botox," I understand the general public's fascination with Walters' fascinations. She is, after all, a person who tamed those mythical She-Beasts known as "The Harpies" and put their odious, chattering, eardrum-splitting yaps on The View.

Barbara has also seen a lot. A person gets to know what's truly fascinating--and what isn't--when they've been alive for 472 years due to bathing in the blood of sacrificed virgins. I suppose Barbara's got a right to tell us what's worthy of attracting our interest.

Seriously, since Barbara seems so comfy in her disparagement of Sarah Palin's knowledge, I must sincerely aver that I've always found Walters to be one of the most gallingly stupid specimens ever to haunt a newsroom, a studio, or the airwaves in general. That's saying a great deal, because the media has been surfing a particularly catastrophic Tsunami of Stupid for well over a decade. Mainstream reporters, anchors, journalists, and "weather folk" have never been more incompetent. Take a gander at the 4th-graders apparently hired to write online copy for MSNBC.COM. That's all you need to do. On any given day, in any given article, one is apt to find several sentences akin to: "Putin say he hang by testicle, probably, threaten the Saakashvili," or: "American men and womens worry they're IRA's and CD's and 401K's could troublesome become pertinent?"

Sure, it's all shoddy and liberal, but Barbara Walters has been a bit shoddy and liberal for--what?-- nine generations, now? Yes, she broke ground for women who always dreamed of one day shattering news-industry glass ceilings with marshmallows and being allowed to lisp teleprompted headlines. I'll give her that. Indeed, Walters was nothing if not the self-consciously lightweight "test model" for the stereotypical newsbimbo, the prototype for blondes who really, really wanted to "maybe try something besides meteorologist." I guess someone had to do it.

Even so, where did Walters acquire this hushed, hallowed esteem that allows her to become an arbiter of The Fascinating?

I'll tell you where she acquired it: from celebrity interviews. Exactly. Yes, I know--the gravitas is humbling. The trick, at least for Walters, was that she smoked-and-mirrored her approach to make it seem as if she were a Serious Celebrity Interviewer, especially around Oscar Time.

We all know how very serious that time is.

Walters didn't ask those crucial famous-people particularly intelligent, probative questions ("If you were a tree...") but she did routinely get her subjects to cry like ninnies, and this sideshow technique fooled people into thinking that Barbara was somehow powerful and penetrating. She mattered. She mattered like Dan Rather, by golly.

The joke was on the masses, because who the hell on earth could fail to get some liberal, egocentric, pathologically insecure celeb to wail? I mean, these are people who live to boo-hoo without the slightest provocation. They get paid obscene amounts of money because they can't help showing-off their "feelins". Just mention their fathers (who justifiably hated them) and they'll sniffle up a storm. Put them in a room with a dimmer-switch and ask them about the "sadness of whales." You'll get tears, alright.

Maybe it's just me, but I fail to see the prestige or the accomplishment involved with getting someone like Goldie Hawn to blubber.

Making matters worse, Walters has gotten overeager and (even more) arrogantly bitchy in her dotage--as if Feisty Self-Absorption was some brand new surgical "lift" that only She, Baba Wawa, has been well-connected enough to discover. I think much of the blame for this stems from that horrifying View program. Setting herself up as the smug matriarch of a coven of bitter old wart-charmers like Joy Behar, Whoopi Goldberg, and Rosie O'Donnell was bound to unleash the Excitable Hag that's been lurking within Walters' soul for years.

It has.

When she's not sticking her nose upward and pretending to be the venerable Moral Authority among her panel of confused shrews, Walters clucks, rambles, and shrieks like a hen with a rotisserie-spit up its jacksie. I swear she's deranged, as if the glue-gun required to daily wrench her cheek implants up around her scalp has been sizzling bits of her brain. I'm waiting for the day she arrives on the set dressed in pink lace, ribbons, and bows, licking a lollipop and telling millions that she can "now use the Big People's toilet!"

Total systems-crash. You know it's coming.

Given this, it's hardly a surprise that Walters uses her "10 Most Fascinating People" show as a misleading and transparent opportunity to showcase at least 3 or 4 of the people who most annoy her--people she thinks she can belittle, seeing as she's some kind of Grande Dame. No doubt the old bag of crackers thought she was being quite clever by inviting Rush Limbaugh to sit down for a quick tete a tete, but it was really Rush who was clever. Not that he's wanting for an audience, mind you; Rush has 20 million listeners, making him radio's most powerful force by far. Even so, Limbaugh is shrewd enough to realize that the publicity generated by Walters' list-making might attract a million members of her daffy liberal following to his own show out of curiosity, possibly converting the few dozen that have enough sense to realize he tells the Truth like no one else in the biz.

Face it: even a dozen liberals who embrace sanity are enough to give the rest of us a glimmer of hope. Authentic hope--not Obama Hope.

Not surprisingly, Walters the Excitable and Eager tried to use the Limbaugh interview to demonstrate her leftist stabbing-skills, thereby pleasing her legitimate (cough) journalistic (cough, cough) peers and making them think fondly of her, making them love her. Perhaps even making them weep. Limbaugh, for his part, is never anyone's patsy, so I have no idea what the Walters Crone was even thinking, except perhaps for: "I pwann to edit the wivving daywights out of this wascal wabbit!"

Edit she did, but even then America's Favorite Stick of Dessicated Turkey-Jerky With An Abnormally Wide-Eyed Head failed to make a dent in Limbaugh. She "bwubbered" about Rush's new $100 million-plus contract in a time of economic crisis, as if she herself weren't raking-in gobs of cash faster than a Manhattan surgeon can suck fat from some society matron's buttocks and stow it in her frown-lines.

Rush brilliantly averred that he has declined to "participate" in the recession. It was classic.

When Rush soberly expressed his admiration for Governor Sarah Palin, along with his quite reasonable contention that her characterization by the mainstream media was probably not all that accurate, Walters felt that old "tingle" liberals feel--the tingle that tells them when it's time to interrupt and babble something hysterical!

"Oh, Wush, come on. It's because she wasn't inFOAMED! She wasn't inFOAMED, Wush!"

It took me a second as I wondered why Walters thought Sarah Palin was apparently lacking some curious infusion of suds, and what this suds-deficiency might possibly have to do with Rush's initial comment. Then I realized.

Of course, Walters was attempting to refer to the handy-but-empty liberal accusation that Palin is an idiot because, as [hard-working, successful] Governor of [crucial, oil-rich] Alaska, her world doesn't necessarily revolve around memorizing an obscure, ill-defined "doctrine" cooked-up and largely promulgated by a handful of equally obscure leftist professors who worry themselves into anemia if the martinis aren't "dirty" enough at their faculty cocktail-parties.

Too, Walters was referring to the blanket liberal condemnation of Sarah Palin based upon one chop-suey interview with newspixie Katie Couric, an interview in which Palin--knowingly caught between a vicious liberal media-machine out to destroy her every word before it was uttered and the strangling orders of her own boss to refrain from being herself--was perhaps understandably tongue-tied.

It goes without saying that a withered, overgroomed poodle like Walters would never deign to mention the inescapable fact that "dumb" Sarah Palin found a way to outmaneuver and outshine an experienced Washington windbag like Joe Biden during the Vice-Presidential debate. Oh no. Walters would never countenance the fine interviews Palin gave once she apparently felt forced to take matters into her own hands...even as Moribund McCain underwhelmed his own base to the point of narcolepsy. Walters would never give serious kudos to Palin's stirring, well-informed, and engaging speeches before thousands of galvanized conservatives across the nation.

Yes, Walters did indeed feature Palin as one of her "10 Most Fascinating People," but it was typically backhanded recognition--she also honored Tina Fey, who was genuinely funny while impersonating Sarah Palin for only about five minutes, the very first time she did it on SNL, and whose own TV-program, 30 Rock, is about as "fascinating" as lint.

One rocky interview, just as Rush Limbaugh emphasized, before Walters cut-him-off with an obvious edit. That's all the liberal media, Babs included, has got...or all that they want to have, regarding Sarah Palin. On the basis of that one ostensibly compromised interview, liberals who fear the Power--and personal integrity--of Palin the Effective Leader have tried to pre-emptively paint her as a complete idiot, just as they desperately sought to do so with Ronald Reagan, using terminology so similar it's creepy.

Possibly a very good kind of creepy, for conservatives.

After all, Governor Reagan stuck to his principles and chuckled all the way to the White House, ignoring the very same screaming-meemie hysteria and elitism that oozed like pus from the left. And America stood taller than ever under his folksy, unwaveringly conservative watch.

You see, Barbara et al., sometimes "folks" are made out of steel.

Liberals like Walters don't like the word "folks," because you can't use that word in a city, where (as we all know) everyone is just as smart as a slap across the face. The word also tends to mean "uncomplicated, reasonable people," which will never do for those types who believe the citizenry is interested in reading/hearing about the ancient, interracial, adulterous love-affairs of rickety old newsbags.

Perhaps the most amusing part of Walters' Fascination-Fest came when she took some of Limbaugh's words about the unfair treatment of women who age in the public eye way out of context.

"But Wush, you've seen me age daiwwy over the yeaws," said Walters.

First of all, it's no shock to learn that Walters is egocentric enough to believe that Rush Limbaugh has actually bothered to watch her on a daily basis.

It is hilarious, however, to discover that Barbara thinks she has aged "daily."

Oh, I expect that, if we saw Barbara without her clothes on, we'd all see something akin to the recently exhumed and unwrapped mummy of a 3,000 year-old Egyptian, but the that's a different story. And in TVLand, where Walters dwells as self-appointed Dowager Empress, the face is everything.

Barbara's face has not "aged daily." In fact, I'd say her face has gone through a process that is not necessarily the opposite of aging, but most certainly contrary to it.

Walters was careful to add: "Sawah Paywin, whom you wuv, is also going to age daiwwy."

That's true. And, since that is the case, let us see to it (in 2012) that everyone gets a chance to watch how a real lady does it.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008


If America's future isn't utterly repackaged, gift-wrapped, and forcibly bequeathed by treacherous Democrats to Marxist enemies (like some unwanted Christmas fruitcake), please remember this name for posterity: Saxby Chambliss.

Don't get me wrong: no one has any idea if Senator Chambliss (R) of Georgia will ever become a man whose extraordinary deeds and legislative brilliance cause his name to be emblazoned upon the pages of history yet-to-be-written. During his first term as Senator, Chambliss established dubious credentials as a staunch conservative; his position on Big Oil was highly suspect, to say the least. Yes, yes, he now seems to understand the GOP's core values and we applaud his enlightenment; amid the apparent "identity crisis," any Republican who henceforth refuses to lose touch with genuine conservatism deserves a medal, in my opinion. Sad but true.

No, Senator Chambliss's name will show-up in the history books--at least the ones that liberals don't hijack and corrupt, which means about four or five books, tops--for another, more far-reaching reason. Namely, Chambliss' resounding December 2 runoff-defeat of Democrat rival Jim Martin staved-off all chances for Obama Democrats to secure a filibuster-proof majority in the Senate.

In the proverbial big-picture, this is huge, folks. This is heroic-young-lad-with-his-finger-in-the-bursting-dam huge. This is (authentic) Hope-clinging-to-life-at-the-bottom-of-Pandora's-otherwise-empty-box huge. But not because of Chambliss himself.

As a moral victory (and I do mean that in the most literal sense of the word), Chambliss' win over Martin lights a blazing beacon high upon the slightly crumbling mountaintop of American Good Sense. "No!" says the valiant army of Freedom-Fighters atop that particular mountain. "Not all of us shall stand aside while the greatness of our nation is eroded by socialist robots with stars in their eyes and moonbeams for brains."

Not all of us shall look away as our Constitution is besmirched and the reputation of our God is mocked.

We're going to fight, and we're going to persevere in such a way that America's innate grandeur shall be restored without concern for how many swarthy foreign leaders do or do not want to invite us over for tea and cookies.

We're going to rescue America from the pathway of liberal oblivion upon which it is currently being pushed and prodded by smooth-talking thugs, soulless Hollywood plutocrats, and other leftist nincompoops.

We're going to be watching your every move, Liberty Thieves, and we're going to make things as rocky as possible when you try to drag America down your Road-to-Ruin, paved as it is in illusory Good Intentions...fraught as it is with the ominous echoes of "Yes We Can!" being chanted by the ghosts of blithering idiots.

Chambliss' win gives us real reason for optimism as America stands upon the brink of liberal disaster and, when the listing ship is one day righted, authentic history-books will remember that a lady named Sarah Palin just so happened to be on hand...using her power and influence to help seal-the-deal to the cheers of thousands who gathered to hear her stump for Chambliss in Georgia.

Am I alone, or did Chambliss's Palin-inspired 14-point thrashing of Martin in the runoff election give you a presentiment of good things to come on the horizon, too?

Palin--unharmed by the scornful lies and gassy eructations of leftist dragons during the Presidential election, returns with a loaded Moose-gun of Magnificence to fire a pivotal and lasting salvo. She rises from the ashes of McCain's incompetence and, like a smiling-tho-beehived Ronald Reagan of yesteryear, demonstrates her undeniable clout in what may well have been one of the last, critical junctures in the contemporary battle for America's very survival.

I'm rather glad it was her.

Thank you, Georgia.

And most of all...Thank you, Sarah.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


There'll be another reason to give thanks as we gather with loved-ones, liked-ones, or merely "tolerated ones" tomorrow: Governor Sarah Palin is slated to join Georgia Sen. Saxby Chambliss in at least four rallies across the state prior to Chambliss's crucial December 2 runoff against Democrat Jim Martin.

This move by Governor Palin is quite exciting for a number of reasons, not least of which is the chance for her to directly affect the landscape of national politics right now by helping to forestall a filibuster-proof Democrat majority in the Senate. The Party of Nutsy Pelosi is only two seats away from attaining this ability to block Republican filibuster power, and Chambliss's contest represents one of those coveted prizes. The other battle rages in Minnesota between Norm Coleman and simian clown Al Franken.

By appearing at the upcoming rallies with Chambliss, Governor Palin will capitalize upon her already enormous popularity in Georgia--a popularity that helped her ticket win the state during the Presidential election (52%). This energizing move will also provide her with an opportunity to demonstrate her considerable, wider political clout beyond a shadow of doubt. This could be rather delicious.

Once again, Palin rises to the genuine conservative challenge and shows us that she is in the proverbial game to fight, and to stay. She's not going to let the filthy, immoral attacks of the Left prevent her from steadfast adherence to her convictions and her goals. Liberals continue their shrieking, neurotic attempts to spread the myth that she's "stupid" by the old "say the lie often enough and it might stick" method. The Lady Who Serves The People of Alaska stands tall, however, baby in one hand, moose-gun (proudly) in the other. They'll never destroy her.

We'll be watching the Georgia rallies with great interest. The crowds are certain to be enormous. Best wishes, Governor Palin. Blaze that trail, Lady...blaze that trail!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


It's certainly no secret, not anymore. It sort of has the feel of "old news," already, doesn't it?

The nation's Democratic powers are plotting and planning to send the Constitution and the American Dream up the proverbial river in a canoe-for-two, just as spineless, lazy liberals have wanted to do since the days of FDR. Since time immemorial.

We get it, already.

But there's another problem: conservatism itself is hardly being well-represented on the national stage by the Republican Party, at this time. It appears that we have let any number of thieves "in through the front door," as it is said. Until their asses are kicked-out through a window, the back-door, or until they are preferably thrown from the roof, we won't be able to do a thing about the so-called American Dream, much less the Constitution.

Indeed, we have endured a year in which a country-club moderate like John McCain monkey-wrenched the primary campaign and then botched the presidential run via his glaring lack of a passionate conservative identity. His mishandling of Sarah Palin's powerful-but-polarizing potential was an unfortunate auxiliary error. If she had been at the top of a well-calibrated ticket, her polarizing aspect would have fuelled her power, as it's meant to do. After all, we don't want to please liberals. We're not in the business of pleasing them. Not now, not ever.

McCain has certainly not been alone in promulgating the notion of a mass conservative identity-crisis. In the past few days, we've witnessed high-profile GOP governors like Charlie Crist (FL)and Arnold Schwarzenegger (CA) braying liberal lunacies about halting foreclosures in their respective states to save banks and spare consumers, simultaneously.


With this kind of mumbo-jumbo, my greatest fear is that we'll next see someone like Mike Huckabee handing out condoms to school-kids in front of a Planned Parenthood in San Francisco. It's getting that silly.

The real culprit in all of this miasma, I fear, can be found far closer to Main Street than on Wall Street. The greater problem is not found (so much) in the unquestionably lib-infested urban centers. No, I suspect that the trouble may be detected more properly in many of our heartland communities, where upstanding, everyday, average, conservative Americans have started to grow a bit too complacent, a bit too comfortable with the entertainment and media industries' shared mission to water-down almost every aspect of America's culture and society--including (and especially) its moral compass.

Yes, even in our small towns we have become hypnotized by the relentless barrage of liberal information and propaganda streaming into the brain. Many conservatives have put sober judgment on a nearby shelf in order to enjoy what the media tells them to enjoy, from an endless array of television shitfests to each pop-up window on the internets.

American conservatives have settled back, and settled in...too much. They've allowed their principles to be eroded, to the point wherein values are now being stolen away from them by so many thieves in the night--thieves who came in through that aforementioned front door. No, our GOP representatives are not accurately representing us...or are they? Does anyone have a clue? Do enough people have a clue? How many conservatives actually know whether or not moderate, Democrat-Lite Republicans really reflect the needs and values of their constituencies?

We're going to have to wake-up from the video-games, conservatives. Wake up from the You Tubes, Dancing Stars, Law & Order reruns, and general malaise to properly answer these questions.

What do you value? What are your moral standards?

Could you define them, if asked? Could you even list four, or maybe five values, if you had to do so?

It's no longer any good simply to say, "I have Christian values," because that could mean anything in this environment of Starbucks Superchurches with their often anemic, empty teachings, and the Left's belief that wearing a pink Breast Cancer Awareness pin probably constitutes a "Christian" value.

Ask yourself some serious questions about your moral hygiene. About your identity as a conservative. Ask yourself about your future, the future of your family, your children, your friends. Your nation.

What do you value?

If reach any solid conclusions (and you should, if you are a genuine conservative), then turn your gaze toward those who represent you in public-office, from the local scene and beyond.

Do they represent your values? Find out. Ask around. Ask them. Do five minutes of internet research, instead of text-messaging or cellphoning idiots who don't need to hear from you, anyway. Look into matters.

If you discover that your representatives don't really represent you, then make sure that they don't get a chance to represent you again.

Sunday, November 23, 2008


We at were recently graced by the typically obsessive and fearful smatter of a liberal, one who was eager to strain various lies about Palin through the cheesecloth of his/her emoticon-propelled worldview.

Here's the comment:

Let's see: Outback beauty queen becomes mayor of one-horse town, then betrays her own friends and mentors to win the Governorship of a state with a smaller population than Allegheny County, PA...which she promptly turns into a socialist fiefdom living on oil company handouts.Plus, she's a babbling idiot and a Christian bigot.Dave's got this about right. She's not a "life example" -- she's a born punchline.

In an attempt to better grasp the (admittedly empty) mindset of shrieking liberal fruitbats, we assembled a team of world-renowned "personality profilers." These top-notch professionals dissected the comment above and rendered an analysis of the individual who proffered such bilge.

Please note: Our team of profilers stress that their conclusions, while entirely hypothetical, are nevertheless scientific and likely to be 100% accurate.

"Outback beauty queen becomes mayor of one-horse town..."

PROFILER NO. 1: This opening comment indicates that its writer is severely agoraphobic, with an uncontrollable fear of both wide-open spaces and small communities. In our studies, this sort of liberal is normally encountered in Berkeley studio-apartments, surrounded by communist pamphlets, empty bottles of Xanax, moldy bongs and scattered nipple-rings.

PROFILER NO. 2: Mention of the "mayor" betokens paranoid resentment of authority, while reference to the "beauty queen" means that this liberal is, in all probability, an exceptionally ugly female.

PROFILER NO. 3: I concur--a total dog. I would also suggest that an inordinate amount of facial hair is involved, due to the wildly fluctuating estrogen-levels known to afflict liberal women. Moreover, her emphasis upon the one horse, rather than several equines, makes it likely that this liberal would not at all mind being impaled upon the member of a particularly sizeable stallion.

PROFILER NO. 1: For sure.

"...then betrays her own friends and mentors..."

PROFILER NO. 2: This is a clear projection of the liberal's own neurotic disloyalties onto a national figure. Troubled, mousy women on the Left--as if there are any other kind--have a raging need to "transfer" in this way. Facinating, really.

PROFILER NO. 3: And I'd say that this liberal clearly slept with one of her own mentors because, let's face it, only liberals need mentors, or even use the word "mentor" without laughing uncontrollably. I'd say this mentor used her and cast her aside, tossed her away like the scruffy dishrag that she is.

PROFILER NO. 1: Yes, and she loved it. It provided an opportunity for additional self-loathing and, almost certainly, the thrill of an abortion.

PROFILER NO. 2: In fact, this whole line of text tells me that she aborted the baby herself and ate it in her studio-apartment, with ramen noodles, whilst watching David Letterman.

" win the Governorship of a state with a smaller population than Allegheny County..."

PROFILER NO. 1: My, she seems awfully obsessed with size.

PROFILER NO. 3: What do you expect? Liberal women unfailingly choose to be bedded by their doughy male counterparts on the Left.

PROFILER NO. 2: Yes, it's all quite conclusive--she was pummeled in Pennsylvania by a pint-sized pinhead with a pithy penis.

"...which she promptly turns into a socialist fiefdom living on oil company handouts..."

PROFILER NO. 3: Heavens. The subject has made a complete leap into delusion, here. It's amazing to just watch it take place like this. She seems to be projecting again. In this case, the Marxist Obama platform is being confused with Palin's solid conservative government of hard-working Alaskans. What a pity. Yet, it is indeed not rare to see this sort of extreme psychosis from the Hysterical Left.

PROFILER NO. 1: Indeed. The juxtaposition of "socialist fiefdoms" and "handouts" also tells me that this hippy-chick would be quite willing to have sex with multiple partners for pay.

PROFILER NO. 2: While dressed as a charwoman.

PROFILERS 1 & 3: She's a liberal female...she'd hardly have to "dress" as a charwoman.

PROFILER NO. 2: Oh, yeah. Forgot about that. Steady on.

"...Plus, she's a babbling idiot and a Christian bigot.Dave's got this about right. She's not a "life example" -- she's a born punchline..."

PROFILER NO. 1: Well, what can you say? My diagnosis is that the liberal woman who wrote this comment frequents dilapidated coffeeshops in North Beach, San Francisco. She is fond of wearing black leggings that haven't been washed in ages. She stamps expiration-dates on bags at a potato-chip factory, but tells her friends that she is a "graphic artist." She dreams of perhaps taking a class in sociology one day, and smells vaguely of cat-piss and marijuana. Nothing too unusual, basically, for a liberal female.

PROFILER NO. 3: Yes, but what if we're wrong and it's not a female liberal at all? What if it's a male liberal? Would the bits about the horse's schlong and the charwoman outfit still be applicable?

PROFILER NO. 2: The horse and the charwoman motifs would be even more applicable, if we're talking about a liberal male.

PROFILER NO. 1: And how.

(WE at SarahPalinforPOTUS would like to thank this esteemed panel of scientific experts for its outstanding contribution to the exposition and all-around flagellation of American Liberal Thought, AKA "Communism." Join us again soon for a plethora of insightful commentary and sharp political cartoonery. In the meantime...GO, Sarah, GO! 2012 awaits and we've got your back, Governor).

Saturday, November 22, 2008


Has-been late-night grumbler and insecure liberal "comedian" David Letterman continues to reveal his strange obsession with Sarah Palin via contemptible jokes. Palin, after serving her nation and ticket with astonishing dedication for over nine weeks, has returned to the governor's chair of Alaska, where she continues to make decisions that impact people's lives and futures for the better.

Meanwhile, Letterman sits in his studio, a sour, whiny gasbag, long past whatever prime he once enjoyed...and gossips with botox-addicts for a living.

A mealy-mouthed neurotic like Letterman perfectly exemplifies the empty, soulless Left in Hollywood (and elsewhere). Liberals fear and despise Palin because the reptilian parts of their addled brains recognize a fullness in her character that is utterly missing from their own lives. Liberals can't stand to be reminded that they are--by choice--hollow shells of human detritus. They can't abide it when confronted with the bracing reality that getting regular massage-work does not make them "meaningful" persons.

For Letterman and liberals in general, illusion and artifice are the only things that feed the soul, which is exactly why they are ever-hungry and unfulfilled! When they sense the spark of conviction and virtue in Palin's life, it only reminds them of their own harrowing deficiencies.

Thus, these dippy fools channel their usual self-loathing into hatred toward Palin, which is really a hatred for what she represents, i.e. ALL of us who are genuinely conservative, all of us who appreciate virtue, even if we fail to measure-up a great deal of the time. There's no question about it: Palin is to the Left what sunlight is to a vampire.

Alas, if only her effect on liberals actually resulted in little piles of dust.

Thursday, November 20, 2008


Cry out for joy, O Ye of Bleeding Hearts! Exalt the New Messiah, O Ye whose voices are hoarse from excessive marijuana-abuse and endless refrains of "Kumbayuh"!

President-Elect Barack H. Obama is carefully assembling his team of Hope. Even now, he is allowing the sweet breath of "Change" to emanate from his sanctified nostrils. This "Change," apparently, comes in the form of retrograde, stale-as-toast Clintons and Clintonian-cronies (so far). Can't you smell the Newness? Yeah, I can, too. At first, I thought it was another one of those shifting winds that blows across the Salton Sea once in awhile, wafting scents of decay and putrefaction across the greater portion of the SoCal desert.

Then I remembered that Obama has been making administrative appointments. This explains the stench. We'll discuss that, at length, at another time.

Now, however, seems an ideal moment in which to reflect upon the rapid-fire foray of Governor Sarah Palin into mainstream media clutches following the November 4 election. I think a great many genuine conservatives were not surprised to see this formidable and determined leader go on the offensive. To many of us, it is clear that she was deliberately clipped by the McCain campaign, which wanted her only as conservative window-dressing, rather than as a conservative voice. They tried to force her to be a Democrat-Lite Republican for a couple of interviews and this naturally jammed the honest, forthright woman's frequencies. Who wouldn't be speechless when pressed by one's boss to recite unnatural and repugnant ideas...and try to appear convincing while doing so? Well, Palin has since rectified that situation, all by herself.

After nine-weeks of mismanagement by bungling McCain strategists, she wanted to finally speak with her own, unfettered voice outside the parameters of a rally.

After enduring the wanton misrepresentation of blood-drunk liberal media hypocrites, she stepped directly into their midst with no fear and no regrets.

After the desperate attempts of neurotic, pantywaist Democrats everywhere to perpetuate the lie that she is an "idiot," Governor Palin decided to step directly into their Media-Gods' sanctums and stare them down on her terms--not on those of John "My Friends, My Friends" McCain.

She rocked.

Through a flurry of candid interviews with Greta van Susteren, Matt Lauer, Larry King, and Wolf Blitzer, Governor Palin answered all of their questions and even some brand-new "gotcha" grabbers. She answered with poise, clarity, and the straightforward North Country charm that shallow urban-types mistake for "stupidity"--even as they themselves struggle to properly replace mere batteries in their beloved, vibrating Black-Daddy Dildos. (And I'm talking mostly about Democrat men, here). When these mechanically disinclined liberals fail to jump-start their portable prostate-masseurs, they promptly disintegrate into shuddering puddles of existential angst and fear.

That's the same reaction they experience whenever Sarah Palin speaks: FEAR. It isn't the kind of fear that stems from an encounter with ineptitude. Rather, it is the fear of someone so genuine and so real as to be utterly unrecognizable to brain-fried Leftists. These liberals are capable of responding only to that which is filtered through the gauzy lens of some swarthy Hollywood director eager to film a momentous Susan Sarandon comeback-vehicle, or perhaps the next comedy by obese hausfrau Michael Moore.

Yes, they FEAR Palin. They fear her because they know--even as visions of coffee-colored sugarplums dance in their heads--that she is not "stupid." She is, in fact, the most clear and present danger to their hysterical promulgation of moral relativism as the predominant American lifestyle.

In fact, judging from the enormous attention Palin received after Obama's victory, liberal panties still appear to be dribbling-over with the Shit of Girly-Man Terror. Dowdy Democrat women with barn door-sized asses are reaching for extra bran muffins...and their hands are shaking.

Sarah's not going away. Far from it.

Liberals know this, of course, which is why they all go into fetal position in the deep, dark night, desperate for Magical Obama Dream-Ponies to "appear" and soothe frazzled nerves with lullabies. Rabid homosexuals, confused by Obama-glee and the collective dump that voters dropped on their California "marriage" prop, are shedding a rash of valuable sequins during any number of histrionic drag-shows, down at their fey boites. The liberals, neurotic even in "triumph," are afraid because they know they've only got one awkward Palin interview (with news-midget Couric) left to cling to.

Well, they have that and all the flophouse sweat bathing the Left as it continues to obsessively promulgate the lie that Palin is "stupid," hoping to birth this Great Untruth from its massive welfare-childbearing hips into the dubious annals of urband legend.

Meanwhile, Palin has been articulate and at ease in all of her post-election interviews. She's been as effective as she was at rallies which drew such astonishing crowds of fired-up supporters--supporters who would have otherwise stayed home, had she not been the real attraction on the GOP ticket.

Here are the facts:

1. Liberals are aggressively trying to equate Palin's Northern accent and natural colloquialisms with "stupidity"--a contemptible bias that is worse than racism because it betokens an elitist delusion of superiority than can be applied to anyone, of any race, or any place, who is not utterly generic. They are trying to do this as a primary strategy for destroying her political future. They will not succeed, mainly because liberals do not really ever succeed at anything.

2. Palin does not employ faulty syntax with any more regularity than her political peers when speaking during an interview or debate. This is another egregious lie, another groundless myth being perpetrated by the Left, which hopes to use her Northern accent--her accent!--as a kind of bait & switch smokescreen for their deception. On the contrary, Palin is a forthright, capable, charming, and appropriate speaker--when she was left to her own devices and not accosted by handlers who sought to repackage her persona as a McCain moderate. The Couric interview was an anomaly.

Governor Palin's words have weight with so many people because they are indeed unadorned with the usual platitudinous horseshit that emanates from Washington D.C. and its array of clanging cymbals. Millions in America (except for delirious liberals) can recognize empty words for what they are, and they're tired of it. Palin's earnest, direct honesty offers a most refreshing counterpoint.

Moreover, it is no crime that Palin has a regional accent, or that she is from Alaska. Leftists who are actively implying otherwise need to be condemned--loudly--as being on a par with racists. This dangerous social condescension cannot be tolerated in America. The sad reality is that the so-called "victors" in the recent political landscape cannot (or will not) recognize that Palin is--at the very least--an accomplished, intelligent American leader. They refuse to acknowledge this through the haze of their elitist hatred. This situation must be confronted. We'll talk about how to do that in a later column.

3. Palin knows what she knows, and doesn't know what she doesn't know. It's as simple as that. She knows how to successfully govern Americans in an executive capacity. Her record proves this beyond a shadow of doubt. She knows how to reduce a deficit, create a fiscal surplus, and how to assemble and then work with a talented cabinet in order to serve her constituency. Her approval rating--the highest of any governor for any American state--was not earned lightly. Moreover, Palin is arguably the most knowledgeable executive leader we can boast in the crucial issue of energy policy. This alone places her in a global context, regardless of her circumstantial foreign-policy inexperience.

Questions about Palin's foreign-policy experience could have been easily answered in her typical way, if she had not been micro-managed and over-controlled by McCain's wonks to the point of uncertainty. The typical Palin would've (or should've) said:

"Ya' know, regimes change and borders fall and the playing-board is constantly being reset in this world. Any leader, at any time, can find himself or herself confronted with the completely unknown. In such a climate, foreign-policy experience can be neutralized and you'll find everyone back at the drawing-board, on the same level. The best thing an executive can do is have foreign-policy experts and other top-notch specialists to advise and inform at all times. I don't need to live in a Bedouin tent for a year to communicate with human beings from foreign nations. People can always find a means to communicate, no matter where they are from, and the willingness to communicate is at the core of any strong foreign-policy agenda. My job is to know what my constituents need, what foreign regimes represent, in terms of opportunity or threat, and proceed accordingly via appropriate communication and effective channels."

That's the real Palin-voice. And it makes perfect sense, without McCain's team straining to produce specific credentials she did not yet have. This is what makes her success in the flurry of post-election interviews all the more radiant...even as we were low in defeat.

Palin was whip-smart, comprehensive, and effective in all of her responses--particularly during the encounter with Blitzer, who tried to throw her a few "gotchas" via the Affirmative Action question. That query she answered most effectively, and she did the same with Blitzer's attempt to scry for her personal agenda regarding Republican gubernatorial leadership.

On the day of the Republican Governor's Meeting in Miami, Palin deftly maneuvered first to emphasize the importance all impending contributions by GOP governors. Quite wisely she did not beat her own drum to the disrespect and subordination of her peers. Mindful that she must not even imply that she is the de facto leader of the GOP (even if she is), Palin waited for Eager-Beaver Blitzer to interrupt her. By that time, having laid a necessary foundation of respect for her fellows, Palin smoothly wrestled control from Wolfie and told him that America's energy independence and other energy issues would be central to her specific agenda.

It was a strong interview, no matter how many murmuring liberals will continue to pretend otherwise due to their penchant for self-delusion. In the majority of her interviews, Palin continued to employ typical Alaskan "straight-talk," which will always tweak the frightening, underlying bias of those on the Left who embrace elitism. Palin blinds such people with her honesty and reality. Why? Because liberals ponder honesty while conservatives practice it. Liberals create alternative realities while conservatives dwell within the ones they've already got, the ones they can feel.

Post-election polls are, not surprisingly, quite encouraging for Palin's career. Rasmussen showed that Palin is viewed with overwhelming favor by Republicans--well above 80%. 70% of Republicans want "very much" for Palin to become and remain a permanent fixture on the national political scene--another extraordinarily high figure.

Thus, while preconceived bias, elitism & sexism against her from the Left is despicable, and people should rise above such prejudices, they have to recognize these prejudices in themselves in order to do so. I hold out little hope for that.

The shameful thing is that many of us felt genuine compassion for Democrats when, during the many tense moments of the Bush administration, they were automatically dismissed by some as "unamerican" or "unpatriotic." I found that to be wrong.

The horror is that Democrats, who decried such castigation, and who knew what it felt like to be ostracized and demeaned, have now embraced and amplified the very biases they condemned under Bush's watch! And they claim to "know better."

Well, they may have wanted Palin to be the whipping-girl for their roaring Parade of Hypocrisy, but the Govrernor was not to be taken. She responded by staying true to herself, working hard for her ticket, drawing millions who would have otherwise kicked McCain to the curb, and not jumping into a closet after the election. She came out fighting, did her interviews, and nailed them all.

She fought, with dignity and charm, and with her own voice. That is what she needs to continue to do for the next four years as she plans her political future, for she unquestionably has one. She musn't change her style. She does not need to "reintroduce" herself to the American people as something renovated whenever she returns to the national scene. She needs to charmingly stare-down the foes who are going to continue to despise her no matter what she does, and absorb the trust of those who will be horrified by Obama's failure to part the seas at any time during the next four years. A few overseas trips to visit with foreign leaders (piroshky with Putin?) and a possible Senate run in 2010 might be advisable for the Governor, now that I think of it.

In the end, when she runs, Palin needs only to run a clear, unapologetically, and genuinely conservative campaign. We are your crowd, Governor Palin. And we will be waiting for you in even greater numbers. Count on it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


After watching this evening's interview with Fox News pundit Greta van Susteren (Palin's first post-election interview) Governor Palin remains, to my mind, the clear leader of the Republican Party at this juncture. She is also crucial to the recalibration of the GOP’s future as a genuinely conservative entity.

If the Republican Party fractures and comes to be fully controlled by a herd of anemic, martini-swilling donkeys in elephant-suits, we shall witness the marginalization of "Heartlands" all across the nation, the deprecation of Heartland people, and the dismissal of the contributing Christian voice in America–--which will be held-up to unending ridicule and disrespect.

What happened to Palin during this bizarre campaign is a microcosm, a bellwether, of what will happen to the entire body of true American conservativism, if Obama, Pelosi, and Reid accomplish half of the havoc they intend to wreak. Do you want to know the reason why Palin has been so vilified by sterile, foetus-eating old wart-charmers like Gloria Steinem? Do you want to know why she has been the object of limp-wristed slurs cast by anonymous members of her own Republican advisory team? I'll tell you.

Governor Palin, because of who she is, what she has done, and how she governs, is a symbol, if not an avatar, of true conservativism being able to successfully move forward in this new millennium, and the Left (in its urban elitist pathology) is terrified by this reality. So are the watered-down country-club moderates currently masquerading as "Republicans."

Palin's performance in this evening's Fox interview was all the more effective because it was not a "performance." It was an actual interview. Without question, I continue to be astonished at how directly authoritative Palin can be--comfortable in her own skin...when the degenerated media is not deliberately portraying her in the worst possible light, via the probings of pompous jackasses (Gibson) and lockjawed newspixies (Couric) who adhere to the little-known (but widely practiced!) "selective ethics" code of contemporary journalism. Greta van Susteren did not shy away from asking Palin about the controversies, even repeatedly so. She was fair; no more, no less.

For her part, Governor Palin smashed all of these irrelevant, foul "how-dare-they-make-her-dress-like-she's running-for-national-office!" rumors and exposed them for the liberal gossip-stench they truly are. The absolute fear and hysterical loathing directed toward this great American woman is all I need to see, in order to know that she is feared deeply by those who would seek to turn our great nation into a soulless, socialist disaster-zone. You can bet your life that abortion is the litmus-test for women who have excoriated and who continue to excoriate Governor Palin. As the Governor said, that is a shame–-for it indicates not only a toxic narrowness of vision on the part of so many women in this nation, but it reveals an almost ghoulish attachment to the disordered thinking that surrounds the entire abortion-philosophy.

And what of the desperate, almost constipated media-lie that Palin is an unschooled rube? Please. Though she needs to prove nothing in this arena, tonight's interview reiterated that Sarah Palin is quite effective when it comes to articulating her thoughts. One needs only to listen to her, during Greta’s interview, to see that she speaks with balance, clarity, obvious intelligence, and self-assured conviction. The women of this nation–-particularly the women–-who insist upon perpetrating the lie that Palin is stupid, are fools. Don't worry--a sad moment will come for these tired, bitter hags from the Left, as such moments come to all who are willfully ignorant.

The proverbial bottom line remains: Palin represents the very best of the GOP…past, present, and future: REDUCE the federal government’s intrusive aspects; LOWER taxes; MAKE all government infrastructures work for their constituents; PRESERVE Constitutional freedoms and particularly the 2nd Amendment; SUPPORT and empower our armed-forces in a hostile world; UPHOLD virtue, functional family values, and the dignity of our working women.

The bottom line is that Sarah Palin not only espouses these ideals, she exemplifies them. Conveniently, she has the record and the actual lifestyle to prove it. People that some might consider "simple" are able to verify this quite easily, while the haughty and self-absorbed literati find themselves hopelessly dyslexic. Truth jams their frequencies...when truth doesn't come spun in a pound of molar-rotting cotton candy coating. Perhaps most telling of all, the charm of Palin's natural accessibility is not an "act"–she’s something far too many people in this nation have forgotten how to recognize:

A real person.

All the whining Hollywood smoke-and-mirrors, from all the howling, fruit-bat liberals in the world will not be able to destroy this truth about Sarah Palin. May she go on to serve her country by running for President of the United States of America in 2012. I will proudly vote for her and everything she represents.